Rethinking Trolls

Directed at the group as a whole:

The thing is... think about this.... given my reputation on this group,
if I posted a flame at someone, it would be taken as "humor" or "joking"
or "making a point". I seriously doubt that even posting something
severely controversial would get people calling me a troll.

Think about it... take a post you would normally consider "troll"
quality, and imagine it had my name at the bottom of it. How would your
reaction differ?

Yet some people get called trolls for asking a slightly silly question
or venting an opinion in the heat of the moment.

I try to avoid "announcing troll" because I think it sets up a really
horrible dynamic on the group. Look back at the thread I posted on
"creating the future with stories we tell."
Here are some scenarios

Someone comes on the group unaware of the dynamic, less than fluent in
netspeak and news etiquette, and gets dubbed a troll. This "creates" an
expectation of the online environment as a hostile, unpleasant,
anonymous place where rules of behavior do not apply, at least in the
mind of the so-called troll. It is unlikely that the "troll" will *ever*
become a functional member of that particular online community, or *any*
online community for that matter.

Imagine, instead, that the same person, instead of being yelled at as a
"troll" is "taken aside" is encouraged to post in a different tone. Or
if they're asking dumb questions, gently but firmly pointed in the
direction of good resources *WITHOUT* humiliation. They then have a
chance at avoiding permanent "troll" status, may even become well known
and liked in the group.

I've seen this clearly in live chats. I used to, and still occasionally,
hang out in Match.com's chat room. Because it's part of a paying
service, and there's a well established group of regulars, it is
generally a friendlier place to chat than, say, Yahoo. (They both use
ICHAT but there the similarities end.) Sometimes "trolls" come in, and
are drummed out. They either never come back, or they come back nasty.
Other times, "trolls" come in, behave inappropriately, and I or someone
else like me will send them a private message letting them know that
*this* chat room doesn't go by the rules they're used to in Yahoo or
IRC. Most of the time, when told that, the people will breath a huge
sigh of relief and join the group, accepting the groups ettiquette
because it is the standard the group tends to live up to most of the
time.

In that particular chat room, the "troll" issue is that newbies will
come in and say something crass like "age/sex check." They will receive
replies like "853, neuter, with green and purple spots." But we also
often will engage that person in a discussion of *why* it isn't cool to
come into *that* chat room and instantly ask "Age/Sex check." (Match.com
provides profiles easily accessed which provide the information, for
one, and you wouldn't go up to a stranger in a bar and say "How old are
you and are you really female?")

I've made some good friends this way... many completely shifted their
approaches not only to *that* chat room, but to others as well. I simply
point out to them that if they are in a place like Match.com where it is
likely that they will meet the people in real life, that they don't want
to start a friendship/relationship on the basis of an "Age/sex check".

Yet before I took that high road, and just went the "snarky" route, the
conversations would degenerate into realtime flamewars and pissing
matches, and the "troll" would get drummed out of the group before there
was a real chance to find out if they might have something to
contribute.

Getting pissy at new authors and new posters means that we may be
depriving ourselves of some really outstanding fiction or neat people
for a number of reasons.

1. The new authors/posters slink off, never to return, never to improve,
and never to grace us with their ideas again. "No great loss" you say?
What if Paula Graves had been drummed out of the group before she wrote
"12 Rites" and "12 Degrees"? What if Dawson had been chased off before
"Umbra" and "ELS"? We have no way of knowing that today's novice poster
won't be tomorrow's genius. Not everyone can learn how to function
smoothly on the internet quickly. Some people take time to adapt. I want
to give them the chance.

2. Current authors quit posting their works in disgust. I've had more
than one person in the past *week* tell me they weren't posting here
until things calmed down. Some of my favorite authors refuse to post
here at all. BOY that saddens me.

3. It takes energy that we could better use writing fiction or reading
it. If people behaved themselves for the most part, I wouldn't have been
inspired to spend 10-15 hours out of the past two weeks writing about
the importance of manners, and maybe, just maybe, I might have been
inspired to go write more of Facing Janus. As it was, I was inspired.
The muse grabbed me and got me going on this topic. Facing Janus will
have to wait a bit longer. If I have to, I won't log on here for a week
or so if that's what it takes to shift the muse. But I'd rather not have
to leave in order to write.

4. Good people get afraid to post because they don't want to "start
something". Good posts are like a beautiful candle. Some people will
refuse to light it if there's a lot of dry wood and whipping wind
about. A natural caution.

I'm not going to say "My way is the only right way." I know that people
wouldn't keep getting into flame wars if they didnt' enjoy it or need it
at some level. But I would like for people to think before they type,
and I would love it if they tried to avoid converasational terrorism.

When I was 17, I witnessed one of my classmates being sent to the office
for discipline for a minor infraction. I realized in a flash that the
reason he was being disciplined was because of his history of
misbehavior, not the severity of the "crime." I wondered if I had done
the same thing, if an equal punishment would have been imposed.

So I did an experiment. Normally a "good kid," I began swearing in
class. Not even a flicker from my teachers. I skipped class, went off
campus, came back on with a fast food meal during a period in which
there were no lunches, sat in the middle of our campus, and ate it.
Teachers walked by and said "Hi" to me, seemingly oblivious to the fact
that I was violating about six rules. Even the teacher whose class I'd
skipped simply assumed I'd had an event and forgotton to tell him about
it. There were no consequences. I was completely bemused.

Granted, the teachers may have been aware of my "test" on some level,
but I don't think so. I was still a fundamentally "good" kid, so I
didn't push my newfound freedom beyond skipping health more often. That
teacher eventually noticed, but the fact that I was acing his class
meant he had very little reason to act.

But this got me thinking. I realized that the people around me were
basing all of their judgments of me on past behavior, that my current
behavior had very little to do with their perceptions. I realized that
this was probably true for my peers as well, and became frustrated by
the fact that they still saw me as a geeky 7th grader rather than the
intelligent and attractive young woman I'd become.

And that realization freed me from the angst I'd felt for being
isolated. I knew then that it had not been my personality, but their
perceptions of who I'd been that made them avoid me. I had been a geeky
seventh grader. I'd worn funny clothes, listened to funny music and I'd
been chubby. Add that to the fact that I "knew" I was smarter than all
of them, and it was pure poison for any chance of a normal social life.
But at 17, I was no longer chubby, dressed like my peers, and listened
to the same music. I was still smart, but recognized that many of my
peers had grey matter between their ears as well.

When I realized that it was their perception, and not my actions that
was the problem, I let go of my loneliness and frustration and had a
great year.

JenRose
<who still only rarely gets truly flamed>
<Was called a "cold hearted bitch" last week>
<is still amused>

Any discusion of conversational tactics can be elaborated at:

http://www.vandruff.com/art_converse.html